You receive a love letter from me, you’re fucked forever

I was hanging at a girl’s house that I had picked up at a show the other night. I was quietly minding my own business as I focused on the business of trying to get her out of her panties. She decided to put on some mood music. I was into the idea, assuming she would throw down some Mayhem or Rick Ross but instead she puts on some fucking Dirty Beaches.

Now you may be asking yourself, why would this be a problem? The low fi surrealist crooning of uber suave Alex Zhang Hungtai jolted my mind back three years ago to the first and only time I saw the movie Blue Velvet.

I passed out at a friends party after imbibing huge amounts of Robitussin* and Peach Schnapps. I woke up at three in the morning at their hippy neighbors house still high as a kite. I was naked with a towel around me and an old hippy dude was feeding me Spaghettio’s with a big serving spoon. The room was spinning and my stomach was upset so I went along with this strange nursing ritual I found myself in. Spaghettio’s are good.

Blue Velvet had just started and I watched the whole thing.   Have you ever watched that movie? Seriously?  Have you? Now imagine watching it high as a kite and naked, covered in Spaghettio sauce while next to a silence  old hippy dude you don’t know. I never found my cloths and had to take a cab home with a towel wrapped around my waist.

Ironically, I was so freaked out by the memories that Dirty Beaches brought back that I ran out of her house and almost forgot my cloths.

If you feel like bringing back some terrifying memories, be sure to Check out the Dirty Beaches site.

-Marcus Abrey
Swellco & Swellco 24534b

Photos courtesy of http://www.myspace.com dirtybeaches & http://herbalterrorist.tumblr.com

*Swellco & Swellco does not endorse or condone the use of illegal drug use and all references are purely fictional for entertainment purposes.

Today we tip our 40 to you, you rotten son of a bitch.

It was one year ago today that John’s girlfriend called me with the news. It was like a giant hammer hit me in the chest. Like super powered panicked words flung me across the room against my couch.  My very last communications with John were text messages about screen printers. It seemed so mundane.

When we started S&S, conceptually we really didn’t know what we were doing. I had just produced and pitched a reality show about forming and managing a sideshow troupe and it had been shelved. Sitting over beers with John, we realized that actually starting some sort of real (or unreal) troupe might be fun. Hence the Video Circus was born. For me, it was a desperate blind entrepreneurial puzzle, but for John, it was really about drunkenly running around in his underwear with lots of naked girls.

But he was poised to be the perfect partner. He could write, he was an amazing photographer, he was willing to do just about anything on camera and wanted to host the vodcast…

I take solace and joy  in knowing how irritated he would be with much of his memoriam attention. He was included in the Philadelphia City Papers Important Obituaries of 2010 as a founder of S&S, then there is the mural off of South St. that I often stand in front of and scream and rant to. Not to mention that we are going to continue to commemorate him in posts like this because regardless of the fact that he wanted to go, we will simply not let him die.

To this day I get people cornering me with sickly sweet posthumous edits of this anti-social malcontent.  I refuse to sully the truth, because the real Squid was more fun. I always tell people that when the spirits are finally sent for me to change my evil ways, John will be the one released from hell to torment me with his rattling chains. He is my Jacob Marley.

Bellow we included some photos of and by the Acid Squid and an early “staff meeting” video.

-R.E. Brown
Swellco & Swellco 64312b

Photos courtesy of http://acidsquid.tumblr.com

You can relax because we have your back.

Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself, “Is Swellco & Swellco getting the job done? Are they getting the job done right?” We think you’ll like the answer you get when the voices respond back.

Some of the most common symptoms of indwelling demons are as follows:
1.  Disturbances in the emotions which persist or recur.
2.  Disturbances in the mind or thought life.
3.  Outbursts or uncontrolled use of the tongue.
4. Recurring unclean thoughts and acts regarding sex.
5.  Addictions to nicotine, alcohol, drugs, medicines, caffeine, food, etc.
6.  Many diseases and physical afflictions are due to spirits of infirmity (Luke 13:11).

Suspension of disbelief can be applied to all aspects of life. Are you ready to embrace the Video Process?

Death is certain, life is not.

And if we are all going to died anyway, we might as well make things bearable while we wait for the inevitable. Pleasure? Pain? These bodies we inhabit, these senses, they are all we really know for sure. Swellco & Swellco believes you can control your own reality and we want to help.

Are you ready to change your world? Literally?

Well, the Video Circus Subversive Subliminal Reconditioning Program is looking for a few good people. So next time you are thinking about blowing your brains out put down that gun and pick up your mouse. Swellco & Swellco  is just a click away and ready to help.

The dark gods of the underworld will fuck you right.

Photos courtesy of satanskinder.com

We know just how brutal and hopeless the world looks right now. It all seems broken and corrupt. It all seems hopeless. When you turn on the television all you see is strife and disaster. The government is broken and bankrupt and you don’t even know if what you are seeing and hearing is true because the media outlets have their own corporate agendas. You live in a nerve racking state of uncertainty and anger. Everything is bleak.

But there is another way.

Swellco & Swellco designed Swellco2000 as a service to all of the weary, exhausted consumers in the world. Our tried and true system works based on one simple question.

Why even play the game?

We are all going to die and time moves faster as we get older. We are speeding to the grave begging and pleading for answers that no one can truly know. We see, we hear, we taste, we remember. Our senses are all we truly have and are the only things we truly control. If this reality is too depressing, let Swellco & Swellco help create one worth enjoying. Think of Swellco2ooo as a hospice for your entire life, we should all be comfortable while we wait for the end.

Our consultants are eagerly waiting to assess your needs, earn your trust and feel your pain so please, contact us now.

Photos courtesy of gourmettrash.tumblr.com

Suspension of disbelief can be applied to all aspects of life.

To be “mentally” reconditioned means that Swellco & Swellco’s Video Circus process “quickens” (or makes alive) our numb mind. When a consumer believes in the process of the Video Circus, trusting us alone to encourage all perversions- then Swellco & Swellco come’s into one’s mind in the form of a new and better reality.

Photos courtesy of http://www.sex.sc & http://gunsoverknives.tumblr.com