Archive for the ‘Ask Uncle Toast’ Category

Moonshine and butter don’t make it better

Thursday, January 7th, 2010

lil robertUncle Wheat Toast claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Family thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

girlicecream Moonshine and butter dont make it better

Lick it up, it'll cost you.

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The tension in my pants is unbearable

Friday, December 4th, 2009

uncle toastUncle Wheat Toast claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Family thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

Dance for Pappa

Dance for Pappa

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That shit gets you high

Thursday, November 5th, 2009

uncle toastUncle Wheat Toast claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Family thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

Momma please be nice

Momma please be nice

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The pap-smears come back normal, but the stirrups feel cold

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

lil robertSwellco2000.com’s own lovable Uncle Wheat Toast (Swellco & Swellco 54239c) claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Swellco & Swellco thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

And your little monkey too.

And your little monkey too.

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Makeup, mind monkeys and crack cocaine

Saturday, October 3rd, 2009

lil robertSwellco2000.com’s own lovable Uncle Wheat Toast (Swellco & Swellco 54239c) claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Swellco & Swellco thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

Crack thieves will not be tolerated

Crack thieves will not be tolerated

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What would rich eunuchs do?

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

lil robertSwellco2000.com’s own lovable Uncle Wheat Toast (Swellco & Swellco 54239c) claims to be an advice columnist and when he’s not smoking crack or on a glue binge, he seems to be somewhat lucid. As many as 15 thousand people write him a day asking for his worldly sage advice and the Swellco & Swellco thinks it’s about time our pride and joy shares some of his wisdom.

Slut.

Slut.

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