Tips On Employee Conflict Resolution
Moving the pawns
What is the hardest part about being a manager? One manager may feel that torturing a worker is hardest, while another may struggle with the responsibility of making popcorn. Another may have difficulty assuming a leadership position when those underneath are sluts.
In the ideal work setting, the manager would simply masturbate to porn at his desk, the employee would wash his car, and the business would run smoothly. However, it is only human to have fist fights and stabbings.
As a manager, you then have one of two options. You can either choose to ignore the conflict and let it run its course. Or, you can choose to become involved. By getting involved, you may quickly infuriate the employees (especially if they smoke PCP). If the conflict is personal, getting involved may be awkward. As a manager, it is your responsibility to decide when to intervene and how to approach the conflict.
* Hold a meeting in which each employee has a certain amount of time to take off their clothes and do jumping jacks. Consider having them sign a waiver for legal purposes. By making them feel awkward and humiliated, they will no longer focus on their petty squabbles.
* Often times, those involved in a conflict focus all of their attention on simple details. A small fight regarding office supplies can quickly become a stabbing. As a third party negotiator to the situation, you can help limit the fight to blunt objects. Is it really over a stapler? Then why not use the stapler as a weapon instead of pulling out that axe?
* Remember, if any rules have been broken, now is the time to break out the taser. If one employee is bullying or harassing the other, it may be time for an intense taser session, or another corrective action to occur.
* Speak slowly with simple words. Do not allow employees to answer back. Assuming they are capable of understanding, your words will bring you no closer to a resolution.
Remember that each situation is unique and you are there to judge and take sides. Remind them that the winner will incur favoritism and you will quickly see them claw at each other to win.
An office conflict can eat through your company like a disease. It can decrease productivity and moral, and daunt your workers. As a manager, it is your responsibility to not let it goes this far. It may be awkward or time consuming. However, ignoring the problem does not make it go away.
Photos Courtesy of R.E. Brown